be stupid," he said, exasperated. "Don't youlike having ten toes?"
He crammed his body into the nonexistent space, forcing the zipper up behind himself.
And then I couldn't object - I didn't want to anymore. He was so warm. His arms constricted
around me, holding me snugly against his bare chest. The heat was irresistible, like air after
being underwater for too long. He cringed when I pressed my icy fingers eagerly against his
skin.
"Jeez, you're freezing, Bella," he complained.
"S-s-s-s-sorry," I stuttered.
"Try to relax," he suggested as another shiver rippled through me violently. "You'll be warm
in a minute. Of course, you'd warm up faster if you took your clothes off."
Edward growled sharply.
"That's just a simple fact," Jacob defended himself. "Survival one-oh-one."
"C-c-cut it out, Jake," I said angrily, though my body refused to even try to pull away from
him. "N-n-n-nobody really n-n-n-n-needs all ten t-t-t-toes."
"Don't worry about the bloodsucker," Jacob suggested, and his tone was smug. "He's just
jealous."
"Of course I am." Edward's voice was velvet again, under control, a musical murmur in the
darkness. "You don't have the faintest idea how much I wish I could do what you're doing
for her, mongrel."
"Those are the breaks," Jacob said lightly, but then his tone soured. "At least you know she
wishes it was you."
"True," Edward agreed.
The shuddering slowed, became bearable while they wrangled.
"There," Jacob said, pleased. "Feeling better?"
I was finally able to speak clearly. "Yes."
"Your lips are still blue," he mused. "Want me to warm those up for you, too? You only have
to ask."
Edward sighed heavily.
"Behave yourself," I muttered, pressing my face against his shoulder. He flinched again when
my cold skin touched his, and I smiled with slightly vindictive satisfaction.
It was already warm and snug inside the sleeping bag. Jacob's body heat seemed to radiate
from every side - maybe because there was somuch of him. I kicked my boots off, and pushed
my toes against his legs. He jumped slightly, and then leaned his head down to press his hot
cheek against my numb ear.
I noticed that Jacob's skin had a woodsy, musky scent - it fit the setting, here in the middle of
the forest. It was nice. I wondered if the Cullens and the Quileutes weren't just playing up
that whole odor issue because of their prejudices. Everyone smelled fine to me.
The storm howled like an animal attacking the tent, but it didn't worry me now. Jacob was
out of the cold, and so was I. Plus, I was simply too exhausted to worry about anything -
tired from just staying awake so late, and aching from the muscle spasms. My body relaxed
slowly as I thawed, piece by frozen piece, and then turned limp.
"Jake?" I mumbled sleepily. "Can I ask you something? I'm not trying to be a jerk or
anything, I'm honestly curious." They were the same words he'd used in my kitchen . . . how
long ago was it now?
"Sure," he chuckled, remembering.
"Why are you so much furrier than your friends? You don't have to answer if I'm being rude."
I didn't know the rules for etiquette as they applied to werewolf culture.
"Because my hair is longer," he said, amused - my question hadn't offended him, at least. He
shook his head so that his unkempt hair - grown out to his chin now - tickled my cheek.
"Oh." I was surprised, but it made sense. So that was why they'd all cropped their hair in the
beginning, when they joined the pack. "Then why don't you cut it? Do you like to be
shaggy?"
He didn't answer right away this time, and Edward laughed under his breath.
"Sorry," I said, pausing to yawn. "I didn't mean to pry. You don't have to tell me."
Jacob made an annoyed sound. "Oh, he'll tell you anyway, so I might as well. . . . I was
growing my hair out because . . . it seemed like you liked it better long."
"Oh." I felt awkward. "I, er, like it both ways, Jake. You don't need to be . . .
inconvenienced."
He shrugged. "Turns out it was very convenient tonight, so don't worry about it."
I didn't have anything else to say. As the silence lengthened, my eyelids drooped and shut,
and my breathing grew slower, more even.
"That's right, honey, go to sleep," Jacob whispered.
I sighed, content, already half-unconscious.
"Seth is here," Edward muttered to Jacob, and I suddenly understood the point of the
howling.
"Perfect. Now you can keep an eye on everything else, while I take care of your girlfriend for
you."
Edward didn't answer, but I groaned groggily. "Stop it," I muttered.
It was quiet then, inside at least. Outside, the wind shrieked insanely through the trees. The
shimmying of the tent made it hard to sleep. The poles would suddenly jerk and quiver,
pulling me back from the edge of unconsciousness each time I was close to slipping under. I
felt so bad for the wolf, the boy that was stuck outside in the snow.
My mind wandered as I waited for sleep to find me. This warm little space made me think of
the early days with Jacob, and I remembered how it used to be when he was my replacement
sun, the warmth that made my empty life livable. It had been a while since I'd thought of
Jake that way, but here he was, warming me again.
"Please!" Edward hissed. "Do youmind !"
"What?" Jacob whispered back, his tone surprised.
"Do you think you couldattempt to control your thoughts?" Edward's low whisper was
furious.
"No one said you had to listen," Jacob muttered, defiant, yet still embarrassed. "Get out of
my head."
"I wish Icould. You have no idea how loud your little fantasies are. It's like you're shouting
them at me."
"I'll try to keep it down," Jacob whispered sarcastically.
There was a brief moment of silence.
"Yes," Edward answered an unspoken thought in a murmur so low I barely made it out. "I'm
jealous of that, too."
"I figured it was like that," Jacob whispered smugly. "Sort of evens the playing field up a
little, doesn't it?"
Edward chuckled. "In your dreams."
"You know, she could still change her mind," Jacob taunted him. "Consideringall the things I
could do with her that you can't. At least, not without killing her, that is."
"Go to sleep, Jacob," Edward murmured. "You're starting to get on my nerves."
"I think I will. I'm really very comfortable."
Edward didn't answer.
I was too far gone to ask them to stop talking about me like I wasn't there. The conversation
had taken on a dreamlike quality to me, and I wasn't sure I was really awake.
"Maybe I would," Edward said after a moment, answering a question I hadn't heard.
"But would you be honest?"
"You can always ask and see." Edward's tone made me wonder if I was missing out on a
joke.
"Well, you see inside my head - let me see inside yours tonight, it's only fair," Jacob said.
"Your head is full of questions. Which one do you want me to answer?"
"The jealousy . . . ithas to be eating at you. You can't be as sure of yourself as you seem.
Unless you have no emotions at all."
"Of course it is," Edward agreed, no longer amused. "Right now it's so bad that I can barely
control my voice. Of course, it's even worse when she's away from me, with you, and I can't
see her."
"Do you think about it all the time?" Jacob whispered. "Does it make it hard to concentrate
when she's not with you?"
"Yes and no," Edward said; he seemed determined to answer honestly. "My mind doesn't
work quite the same as yours. I can think of many more things at one time. Of course, that
means that I'malways able to think of you, always able to wonder if that's where her mind is,
when she's quiet and thoughtful."
They were both still for a minute.
"Yes, I would guess that she thinks about you often," Edward murmured in response to
Jacob's thoughts. "More often than I like. She worries that you're unhappy. Not that you
don't know that. Not that you don'tuse that."
"I have to use whatever I can," Jacob muttered. "I'm not working with your advantages -
advantages like her knowing she's in love with you."
"That helps," Edward agreed in a mild tone.
Jacob was defiant. "She's in love with me, too, you know."
Edward didn't answer.
Jacob sighed. "But shedoesn't know it."
"I can't tell you if you're right."
"Does that bother you? Do you wish you could see what she's thinking, too?"
"Yes . . . and no, again. She likes it better this way, and, though it sometimes drives me
insane, I'd rather she was happy."
The wind ripped around the tent, shaking it like an earthquake. Jacob's arms tightened
around me protectively.
"Thank you," Edward whispered. "Odd as this might sound, I suppose I'm glad you're here,
Jacob."
"You mean, 'as much as I'd love to kill you, I'm glad she's warm,' right?"
"It's an uncomfortable truce, isn't it?"
Jacob's whisper was suddenly smug. "I knew you were just as crazy jealous as I am."
"I'm not such a fool as to wear it on my sleeve like you do. It doesn't help your case, you
know."
"You have more patience than I do."
"I should. I've had a hundred years to gain it. A hundred years of waiting forher. "
"So . . . at what point did you decide to play the very patient good guy?"
"When I saw how much it was hurting her to make her choose. It's not usually this difficult
to control. I can smother the . . . less civilized feelings I may have for you fairly easily most of
the time. Sometimes I think she sees through me, but I can't be sure."
"I think you were just worried that if you really forced her to choose, she might not choose
you."
Edward didn't answer right away. "That was a part of it," he finally admitted. "But only a
small part. We all have our moments of doubt. Mostly I was worried that she'd hurt herself
trying to sneak away to see you. After I'd accepted that she was more or less safe with you -
as safe as Bella ever is - it seemed best to stop driving her to extremes."
Jacob sighed. "I'd tell her all of this, but she'd never believe me."
"I know." It sounded like Edward was smiling.
"You 