air was so short it was almost a buzz.
Both boys stopped short when they saw me. The thin boy glanced swiftly back and forth between Jacob


and me, while the brawny boy kept his eyes on me, a slow smile spreading across his face.
"Hey, guys," Jacob greeted them halfheartedly.
"Hey, Jake," the short one said without looking away from me. I had to smile in response, his grin was so


impish. When I did, he winked at me. "Hi, there.
"
"Quil, Embry?this is my friend, Bella.
"
Quil and Embry, I still didn't know which was which, exchanged a loaded look.
"Charlie's kid, right?" the brawny boy asked me, holding out his hand.
"That's right," I confirmed, shaking hands with him. His grasp was firm; it looked like he was flexing his


bicep.
"I'm Quil Ateara," he announced grandly before releasing my hand.
"Nice to meet you, Quil.
"
"Hey, Bella. I'm Embry, Embry Call?you probably already figured that out, though." Embry smiled a shy


smile and waved with one hand, which he then shoved in the pocket of his jeans.
I nodded. "Nice to meet you, too.
"



"So what are you guys doing?" Quil asked, still looking at me.
"Bella and I are going to fix up these bikes," Jacob explained inaccurately. But bikes seemed to be the
magic word. Both boys went to examine Jacob's project, drilling him with educated questions. Many of


the words they used were unfamiliar to me, and I figured I'd have to have a Y chromosome to really
understand the excitement.
They were still immersed in talk of parts and pieces when I decided that I needed to head back home


before Charlie showed up here. With a sigh, I slid out of the Rabbit.
Jacob looked up, apologetic. "We're boring you, aren't we?
"
"Naw." And it wasn't a lie. I was enjoying myself?how strange. "I just have to go cook dinner for


Charlie.
"


"Oh? well, I'll finish taking these apart tonight and figure out what more we'll need to get started
rebuilding them. When do you want to work on them again?
"
"Could I come back tomorrow?" Sundays were the bane of my existence. There was never enough


homework to keep me busy.
Quil nudged Embry's arm and they exchanged grins.
Jacob smiled in delight. "That would be great!
"
"If you make a list, we can go shop for parts," I suggested.
Jacob's face fell a little. "I'm still not sure I should let you pay for everything.
"
I shook my head. "No way. I'm bankrolling this party. You just have to supply the labor and expertise.
"
Embry rolled his eyes at Quil.
"That doesn't seem right," Jacob shook his head.
"Jake, if I took these to a mechanic, how much would he charge me?" I pointed out.
He smiled. "Okay, you're getting a deal.
"
"Not to mention the riding lessons," I added.
Quil grinned widely at Embry and whispered something I didn't catch. Jacob's hand flashed out to smack


the back of Quil's head. "That's it, get out," he muttered.
"No, really, I have to go," I protested, heading for the door. "I'll see you tomorrow, Jacob.
"
As soon as I was out of sight, I heard Quil and Embry chorus, "Wooooo!
"
The sound of a brief scuffle followed, interspersed with an "ouch" and a "hey!
"
"If either of you set so much as one toe on my land tomorrow?" I heard Jacob threaten. His voice was


lost as I walked through the trees.
I giggled quietly. The sound made my eyes widen in wonder. I was laughing, actually laughing, and there
wasn't even anyone watching. I felt so weightless that I laughed again, just make the feeling last longer.



I beat Charlie home. When he walked in I was just taking the fried chicken out of the pan and laying it on 
a pile of paper towels. 

"Hey, Dad." I flashed him a grin. 

Shock flitted across his face before he pulled his expression together. "Hey, honey," he said, his voice 
uncertain. "Did you have fun with Jacob?" 

I started moving the food to the table. "Yeah, I did." 

"Well, that's good." He was still cautious. "What did you two do?" 

Now it was my turn to be cautious. "I hung out in his garage and watched him work. Did you know he's 
rebuilding a Volkswagen?" 

"Yeah, I think Billy mentioned that." 

The interrogation had to stop when Charlie began chewing, but he continued to study my face as he ate. 

After dinner, I dithered around, cleaning the kitchen twice, and then did my homework slowly in the front 
room while Charlie watched a hockey game. I waited as long as I could, but finally Charlie mentioned the 
late hour. When I didn't respond, he got up, stretched, and then left, turning out the light behind him. 
Reluctantly, I followed. 

As I climbed the stairs, I felt the last of the afternoon's abnormal sense of well-being drain from my 
system, replaced by a dull fear at the thought of what I was going to have to live through now. 

I wasn't numb anymore. Tonight would, no doubt, be as horrific as last night. I lay down on my bed and 
curled into a ball in preparation for the onslaught. I squeezed my eyes shut and? the next thing I next I 
knew, it was morning. 

I stared at the pale silver light coming through my window, stunned. 

For the first time in more than four months, I'd slept without dreaming. Dreaming or screaming. I couldn't 
tell which emotion was stronger?the relief or the shock. 

I lay still in my bed for a few minutes, waiting for it to come back. Because something must be coming. If 
not the pain, then the numbness. I waited, but nothing happened. I felt more rested than I had in a long 
time. 

I didn't trust this to last. It was a slippery, precarious edge that I balanced on, and it wouldn't take much 
to knock me back down. Just glancing around my room with these suddenly clear eyes?noticing how 
strange it looked, too tidy, like I didn't live here at all?was dangerous. 

I pushed that thought from my mind, and concentrated, as I got dressed, on the fact that I was going to 
see Jacob again today. The thought made me feel almost? hopeful. Maybe it would be the same as 
yesterday. Maybe I wouldn't have to remind myself to look interested and to nod or smile at appropriate 
intervals, the way I had to with everyone else. Maybe? but I wouldn't trust this to last, either. Wouldn't 
trust it to be the same?so easy?as yesterday. I wasn't going to set myself up for disappointment like 
that. 

At breakfast, Charlie was being careful, too. He tried to hide his scrutiny, keeping his eyes on his eggs 
until he thought I wasn't looking. 


"What are you up to today?" he asked, eyeing a loose thread on the edge of his cuff like he wasn't paying
much attention to my answer.
"I'm going to hang out with Jacob again.
"
He nodded without looking up. "Oh," he said.


"Do you mind?" I pretended to worry. "I could stay?
"
He glanced up quickly, a hint of panic in his eyes. "No, no! You go ahead. Harry was going to come up
to watch the game with me anyway.
"


"Maybe Harry could give Billy a ride up," I suggested. The fewer witnesses the better.
"That's a great idea.
"
I wasn't sure if the game was just an excuse for kicking me out, but he looked excited enough now. He


headed to the phone while I donned my rain jacket. I felt self-conscious with the checkbook shoved in


my jacket pocket. It was something I never used.
Outside, the rain came down like water slopped from a bucket. I had to drive more slowly than I wanted
to; I could hardly see a car length in front of the truck. But I finally made it through the muddy lanes to
Jacob's house. Before I'd killed the engine, the front door opened and Jacob came running out with 
a
huge black umbrella.


He held it over my door while I opened it.
"Charlie called?said you were on your way," Jacob explained with a grin.
Effortlessly, without a conscious command to the muscles around my lips, my answering smile spread


across my face. A strange feeling of warmth bubbled up in my throat, despite the icy rain splattering on
my cheeks.
"Hi, Jacob.
"
"Good call on inviting Billy up." He held up his hand for a high five.


I had to reach so high to slap his hand that he laughed.
Harry showed up to get Billy just a few minutes later. Jacob took me on a brief tour of his tiny room
while we waited to be unsupervised.


"So where to, Mr. Goodwrench?" I asked as soon as the door closed behind Billy.
Jacob pulled a folded paper out of his pocket and smoothed it out. "We'll start at the dump first, see if
we can get lucky. This could get a little expensive," he warned me. "Those bikes are going to need a lot


of help before they'll run again." My face didn't look worried enough, so he continued. "I'm talking about
maybe more than a hundred dollars here.
"
I pulled my checkbook out, fanned myself with it, and rolled my eyes at his worries. "We're covered.
"
It was a very strange kind of day. I enjoyed myself. Even at the dump, in the slopping rain and


ankle-deep mud. I wondered at first if it was just the aftershock of losing the numbness, but I didn't think 
that was enough of an explanation. 


I was beginning to think it was mostly Jacob. It wasn't just that he was always so happy to see me, or 
that he didn't watch me out of the corner of his eye, waiting for me to do something that would mark me 
as crazy or depressed. It was nothing that related to me at all. 

It was Jacob himself. Jacob was simply a perpetually happy person, and he carried that happiness with 
him like an aura, sharing it with whoever was near him. Like an earthbound sun, whenever someone was 
within his gravitational pull, Jacob warmed them. It was natural, a part of who he was. No wonder I was 
so eager to see him. 

Even when he commented on the gaping hole in my dashboard, it didn't send me into a panic like it
should have.
"Did the stereo break?" he wondered.
"Yeah," I lied.
He poked around in the cavity. "Who took it out? There's a lot of damage?
"
"I did," I admitte